Abort! Abort!
by a.bolina
Summary: [One Shot] Hermione finds herself in a tight spot. Perhaps Snape can help....? Senseless fluff at its finest... or worst. You be the judge.


ABORT! ABORT!

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Summary: Hermione finds herself in a tight spot. Perhaps Snape can help...?Senseless fluff at its finest...or worst. You be the judge.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is the property of J.K. Rowling and co. No money is being made and no infringement is intended.

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Hermione was enjoying a rather relaxing bubble bath one summer at Grimmauld Place. She was in the process of washing her hair with a stray bottle she'd found in the bathroom. The shampoo smelled oddly like Snape, whom Dumbledore had been forcing to live in Grimmauld Place ever since he had been discovered as a spy.

Hermione wondered idly if she was using Snape's shampoo, but she quickly realized two things: One, Snape probably didn't know the meaning of hair care, and two: if it was Snape's, she was also using the same shower as him.

Disturbed, Hermione quickly drained the bath and got out. She wrapped herself in the fluffy white towel that hung on the rack. She was in the process of brushing her hair when she heard a loud and close by catcall. She yelped and dropped the comb and her towel in surprise before remembering.

It was a wizarding tradition to hang portraits of deceased people on the walls, but it was beyond Hermione as to why someone had decided to hang Sirius's portrait in a bathroom of all places. She decided, based on the way that Portrait Sirius was leering at her, that it was probably written somewhere in his will.

Hermione reached down to find the dropped towel, trying her hardest to ignore Sirius, but failed to find the damp cloth. She quickly remembered that the house had probably just taken the towel to the servants' quarters for cleaning, or maybe it had just eaten it for a snack.

"No matter," Hermione thought, reaching into the medicine cabinet for a tampon. She was greatly frustrated to find the box empty, but the frustration quickly gave way to an urge to find Ginny Weasley and hurt her. Not for the first time in her life, Hermione resigned to the unfortunate fate of having to wrap toilet paper around her underwear as a substitute for other feminine products.

Hermione reached over to the pile of clothes she had brought into the bathroom, but panic began to set in when she could not find her underwear. Surely the floor had not gobbled those up, too?

She frantically began searching every corner of the bathroom, to no avail. She threw her remaining clothing around her in distress. She did not notice until it was too late that those items were also quickly gobbled up by the floor. She looked around the bathroom, attempting to take a few calming breaths, and she tried to look at the situation rationally.

She was naked, in a house full of people, and she was still a little wet.

Since she was still underage, and magic was out of the question, Hermione was left with two options. She could wait for Ginny to wake up, which might not be for hours, and get help from the slightly younger girl, or she could make a run for it. Her room was just around the corner of the hall and there was rarely anyone awake at that time in the morning. Before she could dwell on the many embarrassing situations that could arise form her desperate actions, Hermione opened the door and made for her room.

Trying to be silent and fast with her adrenaline pumping was not as easy as Hermione would have imagined. She was just about to round the corner to the hallway her room was off of when she heard voices. Lupin and Bill were talking about some business with goblins.

'Ron's room then,' Hermione thought, turning to run in the opposite direction. She would much rather have Ron see her in such a situation than one of her old teachers and the very handsome oldest Weasley.

She was just rounding the corner to Ron's room when she saw Ron's door open and the twins start out. "Abort! Abort!" Hermione screamed internally as she yanked open the nearest door and dove in. She slammed it shut behind her and breathed heavily.

She pressed her ear to the door, waiting to hear for when the coast was clear, but a different sound caught her ears: groaning. From inside the same room as she was!

Hermione spun around just in time to see Severus Snape rolling over in his bed, apparently on the verge of waking up. She watched, as if it was in slow motion, as he opened his eyes, and gazed in her direction. The man caught sight of her and instantly shot up in his bed.

"What, in the name of Merlin, are you doing in my rooms, Miss Granger!" he yelled at her, obviously unsettled by the slightly wet and very naked girl's presence. Hermione got the impression it was more out of a cry of outrage than an actual question, but she was never one to leave a question unanswered.

Sure that she would never live it down, Hermione said, in as normal a voice as she could muster, "Do you happen to have a tampon, by any chance, sir?"

It turned out that Snape did not possess that most essential item, nor did he possess the ability to ever look Hermione Granger in the eyes again.

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A/N: Am I the only person who finds herself in such situations? Probably, but there ya go. Feedback is most welcome, as usual.

Thanks for reading.


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